The horror, the depravity...

Cower in fear and existential revulsion at this, the Whore of Babylon standing astride the world of music!

[source]

Lather, Rinse, Stock Price Increase

The old exhortation to "Lather, Rinse, and Repeat" is an adage crafted in the cold fires of a corporate boardroom, designed purely to decrease your supply of their product and exacerbate your continued need, inflating their stock price and depriving the hapless believers of this transparent tactic of precious coin.

[source]

The Gimp

No, my good man/woman, our esteemed original poster is looking for The Gimp.

[source]

If it were brown, would you decide that it was not disgusting and freely touch it, perhaps use it to clean your dishes?  If it were brown, would your guests truly believe it was not covered in excrement?  If so, then your guests are of questionable intelligence.

[source]

Your teacher will agree

You sound like you are walking on the wrong the wrong side of creepy, and I think your teacher will agree.  She will likely be extremely polite and reject your friendship.  I do not intend to say that your friendship is without value or merit, only that it is hidden inside of a soggy sandwich of neediness and depression.

[source]

Explain to your parents...

You should explain to your parents that Thomas Jefferson and George Washington both grew and smoked marijuana.  Ask them if they would kick Thomas Jefferson and George Washington out of their house.  Then indicate, in a mature and reasonable way, that they are small minded, historically ignorant, and ill suited to the profession of parent-hood in general.  Indicate your relief at being freed from their tyranny of judgmental, intellectual nothingness and depart with your head held high.

Rad is the incorrect word, in this case.  While I'm sure you love your glove, it is in fact, so bad.

"I'm a pretty little princess!", said Herman Cain as he waltzed across the stage.  It was the last, sad act in what could only be called a lively, if failed, presidential campaign.  Reporters were impressed, however, with the physique he had been hiding underneath those expensive suits.

George Lucas

You could have just as easily shown George Lucas in the second panel.

I think you should continue to see your friends whenever you want and if she voices her opposition, simply tell her that her resistance to your social life is futile and will yield no fruit beyond the bittersweet remembrance of a terminated relationship.

Is this some kind of bizarre invitation to engage reciprocal relations of inverse physical alignment?